I have this constant fear. I don't know how to describe it. At times I think it's so stupid and superficial..yet there are days it eats me up alive. I try not to think of it..but it gets the best of me at times. Some days I sit there waiting to just hear it, and have it be known. Other days I think HELL no. I know there will come a time, I might have to bite my tongue and take it..All I know is that it's going to be hard :(

Rant...

Jane has been driving me nuts lately. Not only is her work down the drain because someone else found what she was doing (yes to her science means only a ONE way street), but also that her lab has run out of money so she's screwed for life. In addition her love life stinks, and she's succumbed herself to young'uns who are only 21 years old...yah about 10 years younger than her if not more. What's worse is that not only does she pick these babies up for a bang but also drives them home..how sweet? And then all I hear is how she didn't enjoy it, and the dude took forever.

In my world..my work is going well. Just becoming more and more bogged down with work. I don't know if I'd complain and say it sucks, as I do like it, but the politics involved with the work have drained me :(

Early Morning Meeting

I've never been in a meeting before in which a woman humiliated people so bad. Myself, and two other people from my lab went to meet a woman who was helping us on our data. She initially wanted us to introduce ourselves giving our credentials; then she was dissapointed in the fact that our advisor (PI) did not show up. She went on during the meeting to not really explain anything trying to keep it complicated just to make us all feel like idiots.

I'm not so sure if I want to see that woman again. I hope we can find someone else to work with.

Introducing Jane

I've known Jane the day I arrived at this graduate institution. She is much older than me and thinks she knows everything in this world, whether it deals with men, books, religion, politics..you name it she knows it.

Along with her know it all characteristics comes her constant thinking that she is by far the hottest girl to live on this planet and that if any guy who leaves her, leaves her mainly because they get scared when they realize they have fallen in love with her.

She claims she is not competitive at all, but watch your back as she will eat you alive if she even senses you might be outsmarting, outdoing her. She can't seem to sit there and listen to you EVER talk about how someone complimented you, or how you did this or that.

Much to my dismay, there are days I can stand her, and we can be friendly to each other as long as I don't tell her I did something great, and as long as we keep school aside.